…can actually be the death of me. Such a morbid start for a post but seriously, it’s the little things that’s been griping at me lately. Possibly showing what’s really in my heart during this time of fasting and praying.
There’s little joys. And little deaths. Both makes a whole lot of difference to how your hour/day/week is gonna be.
Little deaths…
…in not being able to find parking despite being 45 minutes early to class, having someone shove you on their way to the library, enduring terrible ciggie smoke when you’re paying for your parking ticket, answering lots of questions as to why you never joined the CF, getting the ‘look’ when something was badly planned, just not having things work out the way *i* wanted them to, knowing people who are dear to me…are just not living life the way they should because they ‘grew up’ different. Or should i say, they never did grow since the last time i was that close to them.
Little joys…
…in watching babies in coffee shops, anticipating to break my chocolate fast, pretending to be a really smart student when the teacher finally asks you questions you know how to answer, knowing that Krispy Kremes open in Berjaya Times Square on the 27th of April (*hinthint*), having someone say i’m cute (in a non-kiddish way), squeezing time to read a non-school book, meeting new campus students, eating charkueyteow pedas giler and chicken cheese Wrapz, appreciating bright sunshiny mornings and reading a Word or two. Good morning, Holy Spirit.
I’m working on ….
…not being judgmental, not being self-righteous when it comes to the values and standards i uphold, learning not to ‘rush’, managing my expectations, learning to be patient and understand that not everyone is as OCD as i am, not wearing my heart on my sleeve and last but not least, saying NO.
When i was a child, i talked like a child, i thought like a child, i reasoned like a child. When i became a man, i put childish ways behind me. – 1 Corinthians 13:11
Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. And over all these virtues, put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity. – Colossians 3:12-14
Put on love. Hrm. When we say we love, do we, truly? Pruning is never easy. But we go through it now and again, that we may be more like Him in the days to come. I’m nowhere close, but i’d like to get there someday. I’d like to say one day, that i’ve fought the good fight, finished the race and kept the faith! As tiring, painful, discouraging as it may be. His strength is made perfect in my weaknesses.
I turn 4 years old today. Happy birthday, me.
To all of you, have a blessed Good Friday and Easter :)
