Song of the Day: Breathe Me by Sia Furler
Thought of the Day: Should you really be silent when your head is screaming?
I woke up today. That was a choice. I thank God for the ability to drag myself out of bed no matter how little i sleep. Hrm.
This, has not passed yet. God, take this cup from me.
When will my heart and head ever agree on anything?
People make choices. We just gotta live with them. The people. AND the choices.
Dealing with ‘growing up’ problems and ‘living life’, things are really taking a toll on me. Worse, i think my ‘not-being-able-to-sleep’ problem is getting worse. Slept at 4.30am and woke up at 5.30am to get ready for church. And i lasted the whole day. With just one coffee. A can one, no less.
I don’t want to be someone who used to be in your life. But i can’t help feeling like i’m getting there.
And that, i guess, is the hardest thing to deal with. That is very, very sad.
I want to go…where You lead me.
I want to know…Your ways.
Help me to live…for Your glory.
Spirit of God…just more of You.
Come and take over, God. I’ve done all i can. And i’m getting nowhere.
I’m gonna stop trying so hard to be your friend. Perhaps, one day, you’ll understand.
Love suffers long and is kind; love does not envy; love does not parade itself, is not puffed up; does not behave rudely, does not seek its own, is not provoked, thinks no evil; does not rejoice in iniquity, but rejoices in the truth; bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never fails. – 1 Corinthians 13:4-8
I hope you’re happy.
I’ve always felt moved by this song. Especially by the Kim Walker of Jesus Culture version. So it’s really cool to know we might be singing this song for Good Friday & Easter services.
He is jealous for me,
Loves like a hurricane, I am a tree,
Bending beneath the weight of his wind and mercy.
When all of a sudden,
I am unaware of these afflictions eclipsed by glory,
And I realise just how beautiful You are,
And how great Your affections are for me.And oh, how He loves us so,
Oh how He loves us,
How He loves us allYeah, He loves us,
Whoa! how He loves us,
Whoa! how He loves us,
Whoa! how He loves.
Yeah, He loves us,
Whoa! how He loves us,
Whoa! how He loves us,
Whoa! how He loves.We are His portion and He is our prize,
Drawn to redemption by the grace in His eyes,
If grace is an ocean, we’re all sinking.
So Heaven meets earth like a sloppy wet kiss,
And my heart turns violently inside of my chest,
I don’t have time to maintain these regrets,
When I think about, the way:He loves us,
Whoa! how He loves us,
Whoa! how He loves us,
Oh how He loves.
Yeah, He loves us,
Whoa! how He loves us,
Whoa! how He loves us,
Whoa! how He loves.
Thank You, Jesus…for everything :) The good and the bad, You hold my world in Your hands.
Ah, so much i wish i could tell the world. But Lord, let my words to You suffice.
Nothing can separate Even if I ran away Your love never fails I know I still make mistakes But You have new mercies for me everyday Your love never fails You stay the same through the ages Your love never changes There maybe pain in the night but joy comes in the morning And when the oceans rage I don't have to be afraid Because I know that You love me Your love never fails The wind is strong and the water's deep But I'm not alone here in these open seas Cause Your love never fails The chasm is far too wide I never thought I'd reach the other side But Your love never fails You make, all things, work together for my good.
I’m being still. Wash me over.
7-8“But blessed is the man who trusts me, God,
the woman who sticks with God.
They’re like trees replanted in Eden,
putting down roots near the rivers—
Never a worry through the hottest of summers,
never dropping a leaf,
Serene and calm through droughts,
bearing fresh fruit every season.9-10“The heart is hopelessly dark and deceitful,
a puzzle that no one can figure out.
But I, God, search the heart
and examine the mind.
I get to the heart of the human.
I get to the root of things.
I treat them as they really are,
not as they pretend to be.”
Here’s to building rip-roaring muscles. No skinny weakling for me.
We won’t be young forever.
You can’t answer my questions.
I’m looking at your ‘track record’ and comparing it with mine.
Not that i’m any better. But there are questions. Issues to deal with. Things to be worked out.
So many questions i’d like to ask. And EVERY time, i have to bite my tongue. Literally.
Where is this heading to?
*****
How do you say no?
‘You SAY no. Then you move away.’
It’s been awhile. I find myself thinking about things i shouldn’t be thinking about at times when i know what it is i SHOULD be thinking about. Does that make sense?
Slow down, you crazy child
you’re so ambitious for a juvenile
But then if you’re so smart, tell me
Why are you still so afraid?Where’s the fire, what’s the hurry about?
You’d better cool it off before you burn it out
You’ve got so much to do and
Only so many hours in a dayBut you know that when the truth is told..
That you can get what you want or you get old
You’re gonna kick off before you even
Get halfway through
When will you realize, Vienna waits for you?Slow down, you’re doing fine
You can’t be everything you want to be
Before your time
Although it’s so romantic on the borderline tonight
Tonight,…
Too bad but it’s the life you lead
you’re so ahead of yourself that you forgot what you need
Though you can see when you’re wrong, you know
You can’t always see when you’re right. you’re rightYou’ve got your passion, you’ve got your pride
but don’t you know that only fools are satisfied?
Dream on, but don’t imagine they’ll all come true
When will you realize, Vienna waits for you?
I guess i’ll just have to get used to this eh?
Good things come to those who wait.
Been sick today, thanks to slight fever and extremely painful cramps. I’d like to believe God just want me to rest and spend time with Him. So that i did today. Nothing beats spending time with God and hearing from Him. It’s nice to know you’re loved. Even if you’ve done really “bad” things. I had to be reminded that spending the whole day in church is NOT an excuse to NOT spend personal time with Him.
17-18Have some of you noticed that we are not yet perfect? (No great surprise, right?) And are you ready to make the accusation that since people like me, who go through Christ in order to get things right with God, aren’t perfectly virtuous, Christ must therefore be an accessory to sin? The accusation is frivolous. If I was “trying to be good,” I would be rebuilding the same old barn that I tore down. I would be acting as a charlatan.
19-21What actually took place is this: I tried keeping rules and working my head off to please God, and it didn’t work. So I quit being a “law man” so that I could be God’s man. Christ’s life showed me how, and enabled me to do it. I identified myself completely with him. Indeed, I have been crucified with Christ. My ego is no longer central. It is no longer important that I appear righteous before you or have your good opinion, and I am no longer driven to impress God. Christ lives in me. The life you see me living is not “mine,” but it is lived by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me. I am not going to go back on that.
Is it not clear to you that to go back to that old rule-keeping, peer-pleasing religion would be an abandonment of everything personal and free in my relationship with God? I refuse to do that, to repudiate God’s grace. If a living relationship with God could come by rule-keeping, then Christ died unnecessarily.
- Galatians 2:19-21 -
How can i live as if Christ didn’t die for me?
Maybe if you understood that Christ died for YOU too, then you would understand why i do what i do. Why i’m always ‘busy’. But i’m not busy for busy sake. I really believe in what i do. In what i’m sowing into. I know where my time and money goes. I know.
And i may complain i can’t buy ‘em “pretty green shoesies”. But i don’t regret the decisions i’ve made. The cause i’ve given my life to. And i believe all that i NEED and WANT will come. I’m putting my treasure where my heart is. So forgive me, when i say, no, i don’t think the life you lead is meant for me.
Waiting for Your timing, Lord :) I’m ready.
I’ve got my eyes wide open.
And i’m not too sure if i like what i see.
Control your words…and you control your world. – Pr Kenneth Chin
*****
Resolution #2 : I need to stop being such a doormat.
:(
Okay, so i rarely do this. But when i do, i tell the whole world about it. Only so that i can make myself feel better.
So i turned 22 on Sunday. With my long-didn’t-do-anything-for-4-months hairdo.
Yeah. Gembira betul. So happy, i decided to give myself a birthday treat with a recent angpow. Woots! :D
Meet the new ‘do’. Hello, me.
At first, i didn’t quite like it. Only cause this is the *shortest* i’ve cut my hair since Form 3.
I hope i don’t look too young to work. *grin*
The ultimate ‘long bob’ look. Didn’t have the guts for a ‘short bob’. Hee.
