Okay, so i rarely do this. But when i do, i tell the whole world about it. Only so that i can make myself feel better.

So i turned 22 on Sunday. With my long-didn’t-do-anything-for-4-months hairdo.

Yeah. Gembira betul.  So happy, i decided to give myself a birthday treat with a recent angpow. Woots! :D

Meet the new ‘do’. Hello, me.

At first, i didn’t quite like it. Only cause this is the *shortest* i’ve cut my hair since Form 3.

I hope i don’t look too young to work. *grin*

The ultimate ‘long bob’ look. Didn’t have the guts for a ’short bob’. Hee.

Just a short update on what i’ve been up to :

#1. I’m really enjoying myself here.

#2. I’ve been eating non-stop. Sudah bulat giler :S

#3. The weather here has been erratic. Sun-shiny and rainy within hours. The clouds here move so fast.

#4. Melbourne is a chocolate and coffee haven. Seriously. They drink chocolate here. Not eat it. AND, i drank more coffee in this 5 days than i have in 6 months. Elder and Jason will be so proud of me :D

#5.  I’m *still* getting used to the transportation system here. I’ve been going the same route everyday…you’d think i know the streets well by now. Oh well.

#6. Penguins are smaller than i thought they would be. Happy (from Happy Feet) are of a different breed. :D Melbourne ones are short and they make quacking noises.

#7. I *love* the wide open spaces on the way to Mt Dandenong & Philip Island. And i saw sheep :D

#8. I had craving for Chinese food today. Had charsiew and RICE. *beams*

#9. Went for 3 services today. 1 in Bridge Church in Richmond and 2 in Planetshakers. I know, old habits die hard? Heh. Quite enjoyed myself. Observed different things and thought…church is never gonna be perfect. No matter how famous. Also felt awkward in being a guest and having to stand up as a newcomer. Heh. Was praying so hard for services back home! Was glad to receive updates. Thank you :)

#10. I miss Malaysia. Some places are awesome to visit. But nothing beats home :)

Happy Merdeka, everyone :)

It’s 1.15am on a Monday morning. Am gonna leave for Melbourne today for 10 days of fun galore! I can’t wait. So many things i wanna do. So many things i wanna see. So many people i’d love to catch up with. Wait for me :)

I’m looking forward to spending time with You :) I’ve this funny feeling that i’ve been looking in the wrong places. I pray that this 10 day ’sabbatical’ will bring some confirmations i’m seeking :)

Oh, and i’m not done packing yet. Heh. Not like there’s much to bring. I’m just..afraid of the cold. Lol.

You guys be good :)

I broke today. The crack that was made months ago finally gave way. God had to piece me together just so that i could look somewhat sane till after 4pm service.

God is within her, she will not fall; God will help her at break of day. – Psalm 46:5

Sometimes, i really don’t know why i bother. Managing expectations and a thorough heart-check is high on the to-do list.

Pastor shared in Bloom that girls think with their hearts. When they should really be thinking with their minds. God forbid it should be merged into one.

My brain seems pretty elusive in this matter. Have i become shallow? I hope not. I’d hate to disappoint you. Rather…i’d hate to be just like everyone else.

What else can i say? It’s not you…it’s me?

Crazy week. Here’s to staying alive. And aloof. I’m looking forward to tomorrow.

You’re so amazing.

Record-breaking Homes. Wow.

New people inviting more people. Wow.

One of my girls came Home to Malaysia when i least expected the news. Wow.

Experiencing unnecessary ‘fuss’ but knowing that God, You come through for me time and time again. WOW.

This is my heart’s cry. I don’t need anyone or anything else. Just…You.

*release*

I coined a new catchphrase today. “Put a muzzle o’er it.” Restraining? Very much so.

I keep reminding myself that we can only be fools so many times.

In my head I repeat our conversations,
Over and over ’til they feel like hallucinations,
You know me, I love to lose my mind.
And everytime anybody speaks your name,
I still feel the same, I ache, I ache, I ache inside.

-The Last Day On Earth-Kate Miller-Heidke-

I’m exhausted.

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You know something’s not right when you listen to The Climb by Miley Cyrus and think THAT’S emo. Pffft.

3 hours. That’s all i ask.

…or do the conga. Hah. I find myself to be in QUITE of a limbo lately. 

The ‘anxious waiting for results’ and…’misguided truths of working’ has been haunting me. Still. I really am trying to ‘live’ as God has purposed me to, but…it’s hard to make decisions on what you’d like to do when there’s no…closure. 

Thus, the limbo. I’m moving forwards and yet…bending backwards. Sigh. With God’s grace, i’m praying i won’t be one of those who fall on the ground. And lose. 

BUT, on to happier things! I shall give minute updates on myself since….i’m rushing to sleep by 11pm. Just because i CAN! Whee. 

1. I’ve started working part-time on Tuesdays and Thursdays in CKJ Logistics, my dad’s friends company in Kelana Jaya. I do…whatever i’m asked to do there. Lol. If you’re around SS6, gimme a call and we can do lunchies! 
2. I just finished reading “The Last Lecture”. Ate some good nuggets in there. My favourite : Somehow, with the passage of time, and the deadlines that life imposes, surrendering becomes the right thing to do. – Randy Pausch 
3. I’ve still got two more books to read and thoroughly enjoy, considering the ‘lack of internet’. 
4. I’d be volunteering in AYA still. Doesn’t feel like i’ve stopped. But yeah, if you’re in SS15 too, gimme a call and we’ll do another round of lunches. Wednesdays and Fridays good? ;) 
5. I’m learning to enjoy God and really just spend time with Him. It’s amazing how time flies when..you’re having fun :) Only You can make me whole, give me strength to make me grow…come, Holy Spirit, fall afresh on me. Nothing like mercies that are new every morning to get you started! 

On another note, i’m learning to ignore everything people say…and to only pay attention to what people do. Here’s to taking time off from people and…gathering my thoughts again. I’ll just wait it out. Maybe this ‘break from the internet’ has a different purpose from what i expected :)

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I’ve been on Lifehouse mode. Call me emo…but. 

And i will walk on water.And you will catch me when i fall. And i will get lost into your eyes. And know everything will be alright. - Storm, Lifehouse

It’s nice feeling safe. Would it matter if it was only evoked by a song? I wish. 

*throws clutter away from brain*

Everything will be alright.

I need to stop being a Marthellie.

I’m liking nights like these :) 

Awesome first night of REVO Conference. Delicious, piping, hot cheese naan from Silva’s with Milo ice. Lovely company. A wake-me-up shower at 1.15am. A little reading of the Word. A little bit of Corrine May. 

Ahhh….so nice ;) 

In the twinkling stars that dance like fireflies
In the blushing fruit that hangs upon the vine
In the face of a baby as he forms his first smile

I see you.

-Love Song for #1-Corrinne May-

I look at you, and i think….

…”where did i go wrong?”

Here’s to being wise and picking better crowds. We could all do without unnecessary attention.

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Isn’t it funny how people mean what they say and say what they don’t mean?

I’m guarding my lips and words jealously. Don’t misunderstand if and when i remain silent. Words are so much harder to retract, aren’t they? :) Revolution of change? Yeah, it begins with me.