September 30, 2009 at 12:56 am
· Filed under On Love, On Personal Stuff
It’s so frustrating, sometimes. And its not like i know better. I just know that there’s something better worth hoping in.
“Step out of the traffic! Take a long, loving look at me, your High God, above politics, above everything.” – Psalm 46:10
‘Be still, and know that I am God’. That’s what You say.
I can only say so much. I’m asking You to take over and make them see. I want them to see that love is beautiful. That its worth waiting for. It’s worth waiting for the right person. God-sent. Love shouldn’t be awaken before its time. I don’t need to be in a relationship to know that when a heart hurts, it HURTS.
“The heart is hopelessly dark and deceitful, a puzzle that no one can figure out.
But I, God, search the heart and examine the mind.
I get to the heart of the human.
I get to the root of things.
I treat them as they really are, not as they pretend to be.“
-Jeremiah 17:9-
You may think that i don’t know what you feel…or what you’re going through. But He does. I put my hope in Him who doesn’t change. People do that. You did.
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September 27, 2009 at 11:07 pm
· Filed under On Fears, On Memories, On Personal Stuff
I’ve been roaming around, I was looking down at all i see…
You know that i can use somebody.
Someone like You? :)
I threw my trash in a bin at Peacehaven. It is gone.
***
Painted faces fill the places i can’t reach…
So many campus students are out there hurting. Genuine, eating-’em-up-inside hurt. What AM i doing with my life?
How do i make it better? What else can i do? Intention with focus.
***
Waging wars to shake the poet and the beat…
I hope it’s gonna make you notice…
…someone like me.
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September 26, 2009 at 1:43 am
· Filed under On Love, On Movies
So i managed to catch ‘The Ugly Truth’ with Elder Shirley. I’m so glad i didn’t watch it with a couple of guys. Lol. Would’ve been MAJOR awkward. I suppose the movie was entertaining…Katherine Heigl’s clothes were awesome, Gerard Butler was oddly attractive. BUT, the values of the movie was just SO wrong. And gawsh, it was so crude!
Girls, don’t shortchange yourselves yeah? You ARE worth it. Don’t believe all the rubbish they show you on the wide-screen. Wide is road that leads to destruction. Heh.
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Heading to Taylor’s CF camp in the morning at Peacehaven, Genting. It’s gonna be awesome! Looking forward to meeting new students and seeing new lives changed by God’s presence and Word.
I’m oddly happy right now. Definitely, maybe.
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September 23, 2009 at 6:49 pm
· Filed under On Everything Else, On Life
Okay, so i rarely do this. But when i do, i tell the whole world about it. Only so that i can make myself feel better.
So i turned 22 on Sunday. With my long-didn’t-do-anything-for-4-months hairdo.
Yeah. Gembira betul. So happy, i decided to give myself a birthday treat with a recent angpow. Woots! :D
Meet the new ‘do’. Hello, me.
At first, i didn’t quite like it. Only cause this is the *shortest* i’ve cut my hair since Form 3.
I hope i don’t look too young to work. *grin*
The ultimate ‘long bob’ look. Didn’t have the guts for a ’short bob’. Hee.
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September 23, 2009 at 1:21 am
· Filed under On Dreams, On Music
I’m here waiting for, something better just to come along
I’m here waiting all this time, waiting for the world
To change it’s mind.
I’m here waiting for something better to come along
I’ll take a chance on you, you take a chance to…
…consider me, consider you, consider the world
And what we put it through.
-Consider Me-Prime Circle-
Relief is an understatement. What am i waiting for?
Him to move.
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September 22, 2009 at 1:16 am
· Filed under On Personal Stuff, On Wants
…in the eyes of the world. Such a ’small’ thing…but i knew it’d make a difference in the long-run. Somewhere, sometime.
The same thing could happen to us. We must be on our guard so that we never get caught up in wanting our own way as they did… – 1 Corinthians 10:6
I never thought i’d have to think twice about something as simple. Heart-check. Why am i even still *thinking* about it? I have to admit, i’m still warring inside. The heart is deceitful, indeed. I suppose, ‘this too…shall pass’.
Looking at it one way, you could say, “Anything goes. Because of God’s immense generosity and grace, we don’t have to dissect and scrutinize every action to see if it will pass muster.” But the point is not to just get by. We want to live well, but our foremost efforts should be to help others live well. – 1 Corinthians 10:23-24
I knew i couldn’t tell my girls OK was enough. I had to be better. It wasn’t OK to practice double standards in this occasion. I couldn’t let it slide, just because…
…*I* have to be better.
And maybe someday we’ll figure all this out, try to put an end to all our doubt, try to find a way to make things better now, and maybe someday we’ll live our lives out loud, we’ll be better off somehow, someday. - Someday, Rob Thomas
It’s not the ‘ugly truth’. It’s truth, pure and simple :)
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September 17, 2009 at 1:38 am
· Filed under On Books, On Job-Hunts, On Love, On Movies
I sometimes wonder if this readiness, this expectation, prevents the miracle from happening. But i have no choice. He is coming, and I am here. – Clare Abshire, The Time Traveler’s Wife
I wonder too.
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I get too caught up in books, sometimes. C’mon, Ellie, back to the real world.
Got lost on the way to KL today, was late 5 minutes for my interview because i got lost *in* Central Plaza too…it wasn’t the best of days, i admit. But yet will i praise Thee. Who am i..who am i…who am i…
…that i should wait for Thy best. I don’t want to search. I want to be found.
One day i’ll say, ‘…i waited for you, and now you’re here.’
I’m hopeful. Still.
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September 15, 2009 at 1:21 am
· Filed under On Personal Stuff
I’m at a place where i really don’t know what i want.
I don’t know what to apply for…i can’t even tell you what i’d *like* to do for a living. It’s scary…everything’s gonna be so new. I can’t fall back into the routine i know. But i knew growing up had to be done…sometime.
Do the things that you always wanted to, without me there to hold you back, don’t think… just do. – You Could Be Happy, Snow Patrol
I just wish it wasn’t so soon. I gave myself till October (which is looming near). And i have nothing. Yet.
Now the earth was formless and empty, darkness was over the surface of the deep…
I dream.
…and the Spirit God was hovering over the waters. – Genesis 1:2
Ah, hover over me, Lord. Show me. Teach me to wait. Let me see the light that’s good.
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I’m envious. I see her, and i wish i could be that way. Less self-conscious. Less guarded. Less…me.
I haven’t been comfortable in my own skin lately.
I’m hopeful. Still.
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September 8, 2009 at 12:40 pm
· Filed under On Life, On Memories
I am home. Fond memories indeed.
And i have graduated.
Looking for a job, i am.
*************************************************************************
I feel strangely overwhelmed.
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August 30, 2009 at 10:08 pm
· Filed under On Everything Else, On Memories
Just a short update on what i’ve been up to :
#1. I’m really enjoying myself here.
#2. I’ve been eating non-stop. Sudah bulat giler :S
#3. The weather here has been erratic. Sun-shiny and rainy within hours. The clouds here move so fast.
#4. Melbourne is a chocolate and coffee haven. Seriously. They drink chocolate here. Not eat it. AND, i drank more coffee in this 5 days than i have in 6 months. Elder and Jason will be so proud of me :D
#5. I’m *still* getting used to the transportation system here. I’ve been going the same route everyday…you’d think i know the streets well by now. Oh well.
#6. Penguins are smaller than i thought they would be. Happy (from Happy Feet) are of a different breed. :D Melbourne ones are short and they make quacking noises.
#7. I *love* the wide open spaces on the way to Mt Dandenong & Philip Island. And i saw sheep :D
#8. I had craving for Chinese food today. Had charsiew and RICE. *beams*
#9. Went for 3 services today. 1 in Bridge Church in Richmond and 2 in Planetshakers. I know, old habits die hard? Heh. Quite enjoyed myself. Observed different things and thought…church is never gonna be perfect. No matter how famous. Also felt awkward in being a guest and having to stand up as a newcomer. Heh. Was praying so hard for services back home! Was glad to receive updates. Thank you :)
#10. I miss Malaysia. Some places are awesome to visit. But nothing beats home :)
Happy Merdeka, everyone :)
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