It’s Day #17 of U-Turn. I’ve failed in doing what i willed in my heart to do a few times. Spirit is willing, but flesh is weak. Trying not to feel condemned. The heart is deceitful indeed. God, i repent. Right thing, wrong time, is still the wrong thing. Surrendering afresh. Isaac needs to stay on the altar. No angel has told me not to slay the lil’ fler.
Here’s another story for you :) From Romans 8, one of my favouritest chapters since i accepted Christ.
1 With the arrival of Jesus, the Messiah, that fateful dilemma is resolved. Those who enter into Christ’s being-here-for-us no longer have to live under a continuous, low-lying black cloud.2 A new power is in operation. The Spirit of life in Christ, like a strong wind, has magnificently cleared the air, freeing you from a fated lifetime of brutal tyranny at the hands of sin and death.
3 God went for the jugular when he sent his own Son. He didn’t deal with the problem as something remote and unimportant. In his Son, Jesus, he personally took on the human condition, entered the disordered mess of struggling humanity in order to set it right once and for all. The law code, weakened as it always was by fractured human nature, could never have done that.4 And now what the law code asked for but we couldn’t deliver is accomplished as we, instead of redoubling our own efforts, simply embrace what the Spirit is doing in us.
5 Those who think they can do it on their own end up obsessed with measuring their own moral muscle but never get around to exercising it in real life. Those who trust God’s action in them find that God’s Spirit is in them-living and breathing God!6 Obsession with self in these matters is a dead end; attention to God leads us out into the open, into a spacious, free life.7 Focusing on the self is the opposite of focusing on God. Anyone completely absorbed in self ignores God, ends up thinking more about self than God. That person ignores who God is and what he is doing.8 And God isn’t pleased at being ignored.
9 But if God himself has taken up residence in your life, you can hardly be thinking more of yourself than of him. Anyone, of course, who has not welcomed this invisible but clearly present God, the Spirit of Christ, won’t know what we’re talking about.10 But for you who welcome him, in whom he dwells-even though you still experience all the limitations of sin-you yourself experience life on God’s terms.11 It stands to reason, doesn’t it, that if the alive-and-present God who raised Jesus from the dead moves into your life, he’ll do the same thing in you that he did in Jesus, bringing you alive to himself? When God lives and breathes in you (and he does, as surely as he did in Jesus), you are delivered from that dead life. With his Spirit living in you, your body will be as alive as Christ’s!
12 So don’t you see that we don’t owe this old do-it-yourself life one red cent.13 There’s nothing in it for us, nothing at all. The best thing to do is give it a decent burial and get on with your new life.14 God’s Spirit beckons. There are things to do and places to go!
15 This resurrection life you received from God is not a timid, grave-tending life. It’s adventurously expectant, greeting God with a childlike “What’s next, Papa?”16 God’s Spirit touches our spirits and confirms who we really are. We know who he is, and we know who we are: Father and children.17 And we know we are going to get what’s coming to us-an unbelievable inheritance! We go through exactly what Christ goes through. If we go through the hard times with him, then we’re certainly going to go through the good times with him!
18 That’s why I don’t think there’s any comparison between the present hard times and the coming good times.19 The created world itself can hardly wait for what’s coming next.20 Everything in creation is being more or less held back. God reins it in21 until both creation and all the creatures are ready and can be released at the same moment into the glorious times ahead. Meanwhile, the joyful anticipation deepens.
22 All around us we observe a pregnant creation. The difficult times of pain throughout the world are simply birth pangs. But it’s not only around us; it’s within us. The Spirit of God is arousing us within. We’re also feeling the birth pangs.23 These sterile and barren bodies of ours are yearning for full deliverance.24 That is why waiting does not diminish us, any more than waiting diminishes a pregnant mother. We are enlarged in the waiting. We, of course, don’t see what is enlarging us.25 But the longer we wait, the larger we become, and the more joyful our expectancy.
26 Meanwhile, the moment we get tired in the waiting, God’s Spirit is right alongside helping us along. If we don’t know how or what to pray, it doesn’t matter. He does our praying in and for us, making prayer out of our wordless sighs, our aching groans.27 He knows us far better than we know ourselves, knows our pregnant condition, and keeps us present before God.28 That’s why we can be so sure that every detail in our lives of love for God is worked into something good.